www.original-wit.net © 2017 by Steve Taite

Expressway to Heaven

sometimes a stairway isn't enough

There’s a lady who’s sure

Every clam holds an oyster

And she’s driving the expressway to heaven.

While she’d powdered her nose

And kept texting on Twitter

how’d she miss on the semi from Devon?

—–

She was known to be bright
An I.Q. of a million
That  went  AWOL when she drove her Camaro.
If she once looked at the road
‘Stead of the face in the mirror
She’d have known that it was far, far  too narrow.

—–

Why did she overtake?

—–

There’s a sign on the door
But she wants to be sure
‘Cause you know sometimes words have
Two meanings.
In the words of the bard it says
“We welcome all idiots”
She thinks:
“There is really no need to hurt my feelings”.

—–

Ooh, Don’t it make you  wonder?

Ooh, it makes me wonder.

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, ooh, whoa, oh

And she bought it on the expressway to heaven.

—–

If there’s a ding dong or mobile

Don’t be alarmed now

It’s just a text for you from Macy’s.

Now’s not the time to text your lover

Or another

Maybe it’s time to check the road your on.

—–

And too many people charge the road
Why they are in a hurry, no-one knows.
There drives  a lady we all know
Whose mobile phone controls her show.
As from the radio comes Led,
Who follows Trucking by The Dead.
The tunes keep running through her head.
If only life was taken slow,
We could spend some more time on the go,
Instead of   driving the expressway
To heaven…